So over the last 3 years I've been in love with 2 of the most amazing guys I have ever known. The first guy i met the summer before my junior year of highschool and I thought that he was the one for me. He was everything one could ever hope for he was funny, smart, sweet, and so much more. But like most couples we ran into some problems and he ended it after about 2 years and it was heartbreaking. And I think that if things would have been different then we could have been the couple that both of us had wanted but I couldn't commit to him in the way that I would have wanted to. I got scared and started alot of stupid fights and those eventually pushed him away. Now me and him are still friends but there was a point that I had thought that I had wanted what we had before but I don't think I could ever destroy the friendship that me and him have now. He has helped me alot over the last year through some things and I couldn't want anything more. He'll always have a special part of my heart but I know that all we'll ever be is friends.
The next guy I met and fell in love with was in my freshman year of college and he was so adorable. Something about him instantly attracted me to him. He was just so cute, and dorky, smart, and he put me back in touch with a part of me that I had forgotten about. He pushed me to do things that I would have never dreamed of. I mean I actually sang on his cd that he made and is going to start selling soon and he's part of the reason that I had started this website and is putting my poetry out there. But after my first heartbreak I found that I was shutting myself down when I found I was getting to close to him and this inevitably destroyed the relationship that we had. We had some issues that we could never really get over and we broke up more times then i could count. But we always seemed to work things out in the end and ended up back together. But then came some problems that we both can't seem to get over at this point in time from mistakes that me and him both made. And now we aren't even talking. I miss him more then I have missed anyone ever before. Even through all of our fights and hard times. For the first time I actually saw myself going somewhere with him. I'm not really sure what to do at this point except keep the promises that I made to him. I've never felt this way about a guy before and it hurts to be so far away from him. And it hurts not knowing if I'm the only one feeling this way or if he's missing me too. I just kinda wish that I knew.
So this next poem is dedicated to both of these amazing guys. One who is my dear friend that I will always have in my heart. And the other who is the one guy that has ever held all of my heart and still has it. But I'm not going to lie it's more for the second one because this one was his favorite.
Eternally Yours
You make me laugh
You make me smile
You make me feel alive
After all the things I’ve been through
The things that were done to me
I finally feel I can survive
You keep me strong
You keep me safe
You keep me together when I’m about the fall apart
I love you more than anything
I promise
Cross my heart
I’d do anything for you
Go anywhere with you
So let’s make this moment ours
I want you and need you
I hope you feel the same
For I am eternally yours
1 comments:
My friend Mike joined your Facebook group, and the group title intrigued me. Your description of yourself below is pretty similar to mine although at 23 I've wasted much more time (which means I'm almost done with the History degree). I like the poems, specifically the lack of structure. I'm pretty sure my OCD leads me to structure everything I write.
I have two pieces of advice:
1.Write all the time, and don't throw anything out. It's cathartic and sometimes you'll be surprised at what you write. I've written some awful stuff, but I love it for its failures.
2.Buy the book Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg. It's a great read for a creative writer. If you cannot find it, I'll send you a copy for free, I've got a couple.
Good luck with the writing.
Post a Comment